Frameworks
Illness
Recently, I’ve been in a bit of a slump so to say. No particular reason to be honest. Just haven’t been feeling as good as I usually do. What to do then? I went on reading. Even though I got the identity nailed down, I know who I am and that makes me happy, that part is all good for now, there are multitude of other structural problems the personality. How so?
Let’s talk about it in the sense of buildings since they are easier to model in the sense of familiarity(everyone knows buildings, but people rarely know me). When you see a building, you can often times estimate what is its purpose(I say often times because it either says on them or you can make an educated guess within 10 seconds of looking at it). And so from that you can draw a lot of information about the building. But life is a game of imperfect information. Its sort of similar with people, you can look at someone and gather some info about them. But as with buildings, you don’t know - what is the building made out of, who are the people working inside of it, those are all up for debate. All of those factors can significantly alter what the building is. That’s how I feel about myself these days, I can see the building, but I just cannot understand what am I made out of and who’s spinning all the cogs inside.
Due to these delusions I have decided to go on a journey to better myself(again) with the hopes of becoming more of myself(again). To the people who know me this may seem funny and a recurring theme, but I enjoy the process of hard work.
I suffer a lot. Without much of a reason. I am feeling a lot of isolation in my future and I am scared.